It was great to hear everyone's plays, from the revisions to the new plays I hadn't heard before. Very good job! I'm looking forward to today.
Ashley: The ending was very dramatic and wrapped it all up nicely. Now I know what you meant when you said my ending needed to have a BANG at the end (forgive me the pun).
Chibbi: I liked the addition of Warren's monologue, and the scene with Lily and the guys. Hearing from the boys gave us more of an idea of what their school environment felt like. I preferred the original ending, with the video of the guys playing and riding bikes and things at the end. You showed us there what you ended up having the characters say at the end of the play. I thought it was more powerful when you let that serve as subtext in the scene with the videos playing us out, leaving the audience to consider the implications for themselves.
Celso: I absolutely love your character descriptions, even for the ones that had one line and then were shot instantly afterwards. The prologue was captivating, and the whole scenario played with humor and action and drama wonderfully. It was something I'd like to watch and I enjoyed reading, very fun characters that will appeal to actors.
Lily: I really liked the opening scene, it immediately drew me in to the story. Some of George and Millie's dialogue seems a bit circular/repetitive after a bit. Some of the lines seem superfluous. It would be cool if we could circle back around to the first scene's setting at the end...maybe?
Julia: Believable dialogue and characters. I liked the split stage for fantasy and reality. The Barbie and Ken playhouse scene was very funny, especially in contrast to the gritty reality of that same scenario showed later. I thought the connections to dolls, the barbies and the Alice doll, was very cool. I liked the ending when she asks the doll to hold her hand to prepare for what's coming. Question for you, why is the granddaughter just STUDENT and nameless?
Kat: Nice setup that sets the mood. Nice lil' bits of humor dispersed throughout. Interesting concept. My favorite part was when the one man confessed that, after hearing all those confessions, he was now suspicious of everyone he saw on the street, even lil' old ladies.